Sunday, July 26, 2009
..don't get it do you?...sigh
you think I'm happy that I'm hearing from you again? You're more wrong than right y'know.
You're not suppose to turn back,you're suppose to walkaway from all of this,you're suppose to keep moving on,that was best for you.
I couldn't do the same,because..I can't.That's why I'm still where we left off,that's why we're crossing paths again because you pull yourself back from the right way.
so..what happened?
You were doing fine all these good while,busy with your own stuff,nothing to do with me,everything was nearly back to normal and looking good,so just keep going,why throw yourself back in here again?
Just leave the whole mess and memories to be with me,I couldn't forget it,its pathetic,I know.You could do what I couldn't and that's walking away,so damn well don't stop.
Forget everything,hate me,ignore me,just tell yourself I don't exist you know.You claim to be so good at lying so it should be no great deal for you right.And all those gifts and stuff I gave you,get rid of em,give em away,throw em,whatever you think fits cos they're not gonna make it easier for you.
I'm nothing worth remembering,but trust me,I'm every bit worth forgetting.C'mon,I was but a dark cloud that just made life hard for you,even you can't disagree on that.
You're wrong bout one thing though;
Non of it was a lie,keep telling yourself it is if that's the best you could do to keep yourself sane,it's fine.
But what you were back then,that was you,without your endless charades of pretense,and changing faces and lies after lies.
Now you're just back to how you were before all of this started,throwing barriers after barriers to cover who you are from everyone.
you can't lie to me,so don't waste your time and mine.
I can't stop you,do what you want,your life is your own.
But don't turn around.Keep going,might take awhile,but you were getting there,so don't hold back.
I always said I'll support you in anything you do,and this,is no different,I made sure you won't hear from me till now,and I intend to keep it that way,for your sake,because that's best for you,cos I want you to get out of this you-me whatever thing.
You're right,we should stop all this.I can't but you can.
And you will.
You want to end this,now I'm giving you an end
Thursday, July 23, 2009
...........idiot...u big big idiot..dammit...There's so much I would say,but so little that would come out
"There comes a point where you miss someone so much that you can hear their voice echo in your head. And you can hear the names that they used to call you, the words they used to tell you. You memorized their laugh, their smile, and their silly ways.you don't want to let go even though you know it's just an illusion.Every time you hear their name, your heart beats 100 times faster and sometimes, you can't even breathe. You knew that looking back on the tears would make you laugh, but you never knew that looking back on the laughs would also make you cry. All you want is to go back in time. But no matter what, you're in denial. You hide your feelings so no one will know. You put on a fake smile and don't let a single tear break through. You're so used to hiding your feelings that you don't even realize the pain you're causing for yourself. Your thoughts become invisible. They're still there, but no one knows. Like a love letter you didn't show. And you're hurting no one but yourself."
Sorry to the one I stole this from,hope you're not gonna get angry with me,we just have a tendency to feel the same way around the same time often,and I couldn't think of any other better way to express myself than what you already did.Then again,you've always been better at expressing yourself than I.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Found some funny pics in celest's FB photo album ;P
haha this is sooo true
/
Crawling in my skin
These wounds, they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
And when so many leave you stranded,with nothing but tiny fragments of memories,stealing a little more of the hope within,without a goodbye worth mentioning,You stop.
Finally finished reading Agents of Artifice,for a book that I had been looking for with much anticipation,it was well worth it.
Even before reading,with just a rough outline and story info on the different planeswalkers,Jace was easily my favourite,and the story just made it more so ;)
Salvaged from a life of loneliness due to his rare powers of being a mind mage(one who can read minds,create illusions,create,remove or alter another's memories)to one with power,but at the cost of going against his own morals,and righteousness,struggling to choose while being intimidated at the cost of freedom,the character portrayal was decently done,showing his more human side than planeswalker,kinda reminding that even a planeswalker is just as human inside as everyone else.
Finally making his choice between power or freedom,followed by the cost of his choice,losses,mistakes,sacrifices,betrayal,revenge.seriously awesome.
The story ends in the same elements it started,with Jace going back to his life of solitude,journeying aimlessly,never being able to fully befriend anyone due to being able to read their mistrusts and human doubts and negativeness,but different in a way,with Jace being more wise,more clear of what is right and wrong,and of cos,far more powerful than at the beginning.
But I think his my favourite character more so because its one of em rare fictional characters that you can see nearly yourself in.
oh yea,to 99% of those who read this who won't know what a planeswalker is
planeswalker = a being who can move through different worlds.Yes,Worlds,not places
^^b
Verdict;
Magic the Gathering,A Planeswalker novel;
Agents of Artifice: 4.5/5
/
Change,is coming.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
heh heh ^^
finally,time to start reading my new book,Agents of Artifice *__* found it at borders after searching for months!
thanks mouse for bringing me to borders on friday! <3
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Friendship,is no different from everything else in the world.It has a beginning,and with it the end.
I guess,i just find the end faster than everyone else.
stay
or so I would say
because I can't let go
I realize its those that assure me that they'll never leave,that do leave.
I.won't.forget.
cos I can't